Do you really wanna know?

This night consisted of me writing a hypocritical bullshit letter asking for a donation for the eating disorder walk as i chugged water all day ate three bites of food took three fucking laxatives plus two diet pills during the day. What the fuck is wrong with me? Like seriously all I do is listen to myself talk in my head? What's the normal amount of thinking to yourself? Cause I do it all day and kinda respond to myself. No one knows what to tell me when they ask what's wrong then I suddenly blurt out everything inside . I don't even know what I want to hear but hearing nothing makes me feel pathetic . 

Time to go self mutilate my fucking body with razors. 

Thanks for the talk