fuck

INTAKE: mixed fruit (blueberries, pomegranate, cherries), 2\3 bbq "chicken" salad (320 calories for the entire salad so idk how many calories I actually consumed...probably around 230 or so), green mint tea

I was in a decent mood today until about 20 minutes ago.....I seriously fucking hate my job, the people here. I've been blamed, abused, harassed, screamed at all day at work.

Yesterday Landon says that he loves me more than anyone he's ever loved.....that i'm the girl version of him. I don't know if I really want to be classified as a girl version of him. Not many people like him...and he's kinda crazy....but I guess I've already gotten to that point. I was fine until I saw on facebook this girl that works at the dispensary we go to got a new tattoo. Landon swears he doesnt like her like that but he has her number, her address, her instagram, her facebook....it's like how am i supposed to feel after all that?? I can't compare to her. She's tall, gorgeous face, always does her makeup pretty, always dresses really nice, does her hair perfect, she's funny, loud, outgoing, enthusiastic...and his age.....Landon doesn't even like me....he likes the idea of having someone around, and the sex....He has told me my personality sucks, that i tell stories bad, that i'm lazy, boring, in-spontaneous, gross, whore, slut, fucker....can't even remember the rest but trust me there is a whole years worth i could say.

I'm nothing.
These moods don't even make me want to binge, it makes me feel sadder and with more of a need to starve.

so much for thinking things could look brighter.